Tinder? Really?

So, okay, I need to express how I feel about this new popular app (well not so new BUT) ‘Tinder’ am I the only person who doesn’t understand the concept?

Okay, now I get it, many people are attracted to others through their appearance. But why produce an app that is entirely about the way someone appears? You’re probably thinking – “Here she goes again, talking about body image” but guys seriously?! Tinder?!

Right, so we swipe left for ‘omg, yes’ and swipe right for ‘ew no’ someone help me understand why!? Oh and wait it gets better, when someone has also swiped left for your picture you have found a match, WOO. There’s also a ‘superlike’ button for when you really, and I mean really like someones photo…or their APPEARANCE.
But I was thinking, couldn’t there be catfishes on Tinder? Couldn’t they all be fake images? But researching into the app, I found out; Tinder only works if you have a Facebook account so their is “no way this app can be full of catfishes” But guys, come on now, on my Facebook my age is apparently 21 (don’t judge me, I was 12 when I created my Facebook) So anyone could pretend to be older? Younger? Even have fake Facebook pictures? Ooooo, I know, scary!

However, jokes aside and on a serious note. I really do not like this app. ‘Tinder’s app has been estimated 50 million people using the app every month with an average of 12 million matches per day’ let me adapt on this, so that’s around 10% of the population in some areas? I knew the world loved a bit of muscle and a ‘banging’ cleavage but how can 10% of a certain areas population, basically admit that they only go for a person if they fit the standards they have built. WAKE UP PEOPLE.

“Dad, how did you meet mum?” – “Well Son, it was in 2016 when I swiped left for her picture, she had her legs out, a good set of boobs and oh her eyes were alright too. She swiped left for me aswell and it was then a match at first swipe!” This will be the conversations dads have with their children in 5/10 years time! Where has the humanity gone? What happened to meeting someone OUTSIDE? Someone catching your eye because their smile was so bright? Everything is social media now and I get that, marketing through social media is through the roof and beats print hands down. But dating through social media is one thing I will never understand.

Tinder? No thank you.

Body Image levels are through the roof! Why!

Almost 10 million women in the UK ‘feel depressed’ because of the way they look! This is not okay.

According to research findings from the British Social Attitudes Survey reveal that only 63% of women aged 18-34 and 57% of women aged 35-49 are satisfied with their appearance.

But, in a world where every piece of media and male brains are obsessed with the way women’s bodies ‘should be’ but who says that can define us? And tell us what is ‘normal’ and what isn’t? No. The media bombards us with images of stick thin models which is classed as beauty who are usually undressed. Women’s bodies are blasted everywhere, billboards, television and magazines, but what body type are we frequently seeing? Young, thin, toned, white, large-breasted, non-disabled bodies and we can’t forget long legs. Funnily enough, this isn’t what those women really look like, this is what society needs to realise but however, because of how powerful the media ordeal is women still compare themselves to them ‘models’ anyway.

In 2014 a report by the All Party Parliamentary Group on Body Image found that girls, just as young as 5 are worrying about their weight/size and appearance, and that 1 in 4 seven-year-old girls have already tried to loose weight at least once. But yet ‘body confidence’ is still not rated as a serious problem?!

Although saying, women quite a lot throughout this article men still extremely suffer with body image. Only three quarters of men are satisfied with their appearance. More men are now worrying about their body shape, with the media saying ‘How to get rid of your beer belly!’ ‘Never go bald with our…’ this increases mens anxiety than trying to save it. More than 4 in 5 (80.7%) men talk in ways that promote anxiety about the way they appear by referring to perceived flaws and imperfections, compared with 75% of women. Similarly, 38% of men are more likely to sacrifice at least 12 months of their life in exchange of gaining a perfect body – again, this is a higher proportion than women.

This is such a growing issue with men and women, but now men are becoming more aware and seem to be falling into the body image trap.

If anyone is suffering, know that you’re not alone! There are many helplines and organisations you can access for help.

The National Eating Disorder supply a toll-free, confidential Helpline. Monday-Thursdays from 9am – 9pm!

1-800-931-2237

Being Different.

Individuality is something many of us struggle with. Following trends and the latest fashion we all are extremely guilty for. Adults always say “Just be yourself” “Don’t follow a crowd” but if I wanted to do that I would get bullied or judged? What if I wanted to dye my hair green and wear dark make up? That’s not classed as normal in society so I would get judged and made to think what I had just decided to do was wrong.

But that’s what is wrong with people! People telling us that we are wrong. Because we are not wrong. Girls and boys with brightly coloured hair or amazing coloured eye contacts are just as beautiful as any “normal” young person in this society, what gave you the right to say they’re not?

Have you ever been through that stage where you just want to change something drastically whether thats the colour of your hair or your fashion sense? I have. Baggy jeans, bagging jumpers and rock n roll T-shirts are the kind of fashion I would love to go out and rock in! But because society is so used to me wearing the clothing everyone else wears I’m now known for that, so known for that, that even if I wanted to go out in a fashion like this everyone would be like “what has she done to herself?” “oh, that doesn’t suit her at all!”

But I’m sick of this, I’m sick of seeing this constantly in my day to day life. Girls and even boys getting bullied or made fun out of just because of the way they present themselves… if that makes them happy why do you feel the need to comment on it? You don’t. Your silly opinion shouldn’t need to be said, is it hurting you how they look? Is it ruining how you live your life? No, its not at all and you should never put someone down when you can clearly see how happy they are expressing themselves in that kind of manner.

Don’t judge what you don’t know – something we all need to learn!

Argh, acne.

As any normal teenager spots become a common thing…But acne, acne is different and my god don’t it make you feel awful.

Many people tell me “Its just your teenage years, it’ll clear up.” Or the most common comment is “Just stop wearing makeup, thats your problem!” ┬áStop wearing makeup? You mean go out with big, red, angry monsters on my face? No thank you.

I extremely respect the girls who can openly face the world with their acne, especially if its really bad. But me, no, never will I gain the confidence to attend college or go shopping with not one thing on my face that at least covers the redness; I just can’t do it, I mean, okay some days it isn’t so bad, but when its bad, gosh, its bad!

Am I the only one who gets brought to tears with the sight of these nasty things? Am I the only one that has taken days out of college just because they can’t face going out with it or even attempt covering it up? No? Just me?

I have tried so much, so much products from different makeup to different cleansing face wash to even doctor recommended brands, but nothing… I’m still here with my big angry monsters and I hate it. I’ve watched youtube tutorials of girls giving other girls advice; I came across one, she said. “You just need to accept it, go out and let it all breath, accept you have acne” ACCEPT THAT I HAVE ACNE? GO OUT AND LET IT BREATH? Excuse me, why don’t you take in that some girls just can’t physically do that? That some girls can’t build that kind of confidence? Sometimes a girl depends on makeup for how it makes HER feel, because it makes HER feel beautiful, and in my case, I’m that girl.

I’m tired of people telling me “just stop with the makeup” because I won’t do it, I will do everything else in my power to calm and get rid of this acne, but facing the world with it, thats just something I’m not prepared to do. I have people who I feel comfortable around and they will be the people I let my face breath around. But walking into a place thats full of judgemental bullies and stuck up girls who contour every inch of their face is something that I know many girls wouldn’t do.

So, yes, fight for your acne to disappear because one day it will! But don’t ever feel pushed into facing the world with something you are not comfortable with. You wanna cover your face in makeup because it makes you feel more beautiful? Go for it girl! Don’t let someone keep blaming your acne on you going out with makeup on because I know that behind closed doors you are trying every little thing to help your acne go down, so don’t you listen to these judgemental divs. Your beautiful however you address yourself, acne or no acne.

WE WILL GET RID OF THESE TWATS TOGETHER! WOO.

Body Image.

Yes, what another very cliche topic to talk about…but another issue I’m willing to publish.

Anorexia doesn’t get the awareness it needs; people see it as a cry for attention, okay I agree, someone battling anorexia doesn’t need to post about it on social media expressing how bad they hate themselves and how they will not eat that day…to me, that is attention seeking but again maybe thats their way of getting through that day with that monster?

But me? I denied being anorexic for years. It started in year 6, I wasn’t seeing myself how others saw me…boys would call me petty names as well as talking about my teeth. “Chubs” “You can’t run because your fat” “How can you be flat chested but chubby?” such silly names that to this day I still haven’t told the closest people to me on how serious the name calling was.

I stopped eating, only drinking water…maybe 4 glasses a day? The longest I went without eating was 3 days…I hated myself for that, Why couldn’t I just ignore food for a week? I blamed and punished myself for being hungry after 3 whole days of just water and occasionally juice. My mum noticed as I began to fall ill, I looked like death, it was scary, it felt scary…but I couldn’t stop. My energy was so low, getting to primary school became a struggle, I was just sleeping constantly. I can still see that look on my mums face, as if I was dying, but inside I was…I was killing my insides and I was only 10, 10!? It was ridiculous…doctors gave me too much medication, I had books that I had to write what I had eaten in, what I had drunk and how much… I was under constant watch, as well as feeling trapped in myself, I now felt trapped at home.

But year 7, big school; it started to ease. I ate more and was no longer needing medication…I felt better but still keeping little habits with me. I was lucky to get it noticed when I did or it wouldn’t have been so easy to get out of. As I say that…I fell back down the same hole in year 9 and 10…but this time I was in huge denial! I started doing my makeup in the dark, avoiding mirrors when I was getting changed, I reduced my eating again but being afraid my mum might find out I had to think of something different. I turned to making myself sick…I would eat everything on my plate and head straight up to the bathroom to use the “toilet”. I did this for a good 6 months…I stopped feeling hungry, I lost the sensation of being hungry. My boyfriend noticed and he couldn’t understand why…I wasn’t pretty, I didn’t have curves or even a thigh gab! BUT THATS BECAUSE IT WASN’T POSSIBLE.

Being in denial doesn’t help, admitting that something is wrong is how you beat it. All these magazines with photoshopped models are not what young girls need to aspire too! Not everyone can be skinny, having curves and big thighs is hot too!… If I knew what I know now when I was that 10 year old girl, I would know that you can’t adjust your body to fit what your peers want you to be, people who love you will love you the way you come. But if they don’t? Well, leave them!